40-Resilience Isn't Found in a Crisis — It's Built Before One" (with Vincent Van den Broeck)
Podcast: Download (Duration: 1 hour and 6 minutes)
Subscribe: Spotify | Apple | RSS | More
You can listen above or on your favourite podcast app or read the notes and links below. Here are the highlights and the full transcript is below.
Subscribe: Spotify | Apple | RSS | More
You can listen above or on your favourite podcast app or read the notes and links below. Here are the highlights and the full transcript is below.
Show notes
Vincent van den Broeck shares his journey of resilience and the importance of building a meaningful life. He emphasizes the value of small daily habits and the impact of authenticity and kindness in building strong support networks. Vincent's story challenges the narrative of transformation through tragedy and highlights the significance of resilience as a pre-existing strength. The conversation delves into themes of fear, motivation, joy, tragedy, perspective, rebuilding, positive self-talk, kindness, shifting priorities, adulthood, ambition, recovery, celebration, lessons, wisdom, global impact, self-reflection, and courage.
Takeaways
Chapters
Takeaways
- Resilience is built through ordinary days, not just in moments of crisis.
- Authenticity and kindness are key in building strong support networks. Motivation is driven by the fear of regret.
- Finding joy in everyday moments is essential for a fulfilling life.
Chapters
- 00:00 The Life You Build
- 03:02 Resilience as a Muscle
- 06:49 Life Before the Accident
- 11:06 Testing Values and Resilience
- 15:06 Discovering Core Values
- 19:10 Building Support Networks
- 22:53 Small Daily Habits
- 25:20 The Fear of Regret
- 25:40 Motivation and Joy
- 26:16 Living Like a Kid
- 27:13 Finding Joy in Everyday Moments
- 28:11 Tragedy and Perspective
- 30:18 Rebuilding and Redefining Achievement
- 31:25 Positive Self-Talk and Inner Strength
- 33:04 Kindness to Oneself and Others
- 35:06 Shifting Priorities and Life's Beauty
- 36:03 The Perspective of Adulthood
- 37:47 Ambition and Happiness
- 41:25 The Journey of Recovery and Celebration
- 43:25 Lessons and Wisdom
- 45:36 Spreading Positivity and Global Impact
- 47:34 Honest Self-Reflection
- 48:50 Courage to Pursue What You Want
Connect with Vincent Van den Broeck
|
Vincent Van den Broeck spent his twenties and thirties building — opening multiple hospitality businesses, working before-dawn-to-after-dark days, and measuring his weeks by output. On 11 October 2024, an e-scooter accident changed everything: he was struck at 55km/h in a 30 zone, suffered severe brain trauma and multiple fractures, and spent three weeks in a coma. Doctors gave his family less than a 1% chance he'd survive.
He came back — relearning to walk, speak clearly, and hold a knife and fork over three months of rehabilitation. But the story he tells isn't one of transformation. Long before the accident, he'd already survived bankruptcy, rebuilt his life more than once, and lost his mother young. He'd learned that resilience isn't discovered in a crisis — it's built in the ordinary days before you need it. The accident didn't make him a different person. It tested, at the highest possible stakes, whether what he already believed was true. His book, Everything Feels Impossible Until It's Done: How the Life You Build Becomes the Life That Saves You, publishes 11 October 2026 — exactly two years after the accident that nearly ended his life. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vincentinthekitchen |
Transcript of episode
Amra Pajalic (00:00)
Welcome to Amra's Armchair Anecdotes. Today I have Vincent van den Brock, who spent his 20s and 30s building and opening multiple hospitality businesses, working before dawn to after dark days, and measuring his weeks by output. On the 11th of October 2024, an e-scooter accident changed everything. He was struck at 55 kilometers in a 30 zone, suffered severe brain.
trauma and multiple fractures and spent three weeks in a coma. Doctors gave his family less than 1% chance he'd survive. He came back, relearning to walk, speak clearly and hold a knife and fork over three months of rehabilitation. But the story he tells isn't one of transformation. Long before the accident he'd already survived bankruptcy, rebuilt his life more than once and lost his mother young.
He'd learned that resilience isn't discovered in a crisis. It's built in the ordinary days before you need it. The accident didn't make him a different person. It tested at the highest possible stakes whether what he already believed was true. His book, Everything Feels Impossible Until It's Done, How the Life You Build Becomes the Life That Saves You, publishes 11th of October 2026.
exactly two years after the accident that nearly ended his life. Welcome, Vincent.
Viincent Van den Broeck (01:22)
That was that was for really good intro. Thank you so much for that. You already
Amra Pajalic (01:26)
Not a problem.
Viincent Van den Broeck (01:27)
right right now you already made my day. Thank you.
Amra Pajalic (01:30)
well I saw your email or I think someone sent an email and your story and I was just like, This is so interesting because what I really love is that angle. It's not I had a near death experience and that taught me how to live. It's instead I had a near death experience and it showed me that the life that I already have is one of meaning. Cause one of the things that I really got out of it that was beautiful was
That your businesses were still able to continue because you had this wonderful support network that you'd already built in the years preceding this. And I just found that so beautiful.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:07)
That's nice, huh? That's nice.
Amra Pajalic (02:09)
Yeah, yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:10)
It's you know what it's like it's less cinematic, like it's less exciting to say, but it's it's the truth. It's not like me waking up and be like, my god, I'm a different person.
So less exciting, but it is by the way, something I encourage everyone to to do. Like resilien the word we're talking about is resilience, which for
Amra Pajalic (02:32)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:32)
me is a muscle.
Amra Pajalic (02:34)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:34)
like any
other in your body, which can be trained. And the way I see the way you can train it or should train it is when you're going through something difficult, you
Amra Pajalic (02:44)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:44)
either decide to avoid or face. And the way you build
Amra Pajalic (02:48)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:49)
that muscle resilience is you just keep on facing it, facing it, facing it. And you know what? It will never get easier. You just make
Amra Pajalic (02:56)
Ooh.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:57)
it look easier to the outside world.
Amra Pajalic (02:59)
Yes. And this is something that I'm I'm having big conversations about with my daughter who's seventeen years old and she's entering, you know, finishing high school and it's it's what what is her life going to be afterwards. And I'm like, you're feeling all of these big emotions and these big fears because this is the first big change in your life. But the more that you continue on and you have these big
You know, huge things happen in your life, the huge transitions, the more that you learn what you can deal with and how you can deal with it. and I think that's coming through your story because, you know, y you already had that basis of of being able to survive difficult things. So in one sense it was like this is what life is. This is what what it means to live.
Viincent Van den Broeck (03:47)
yeah, by the way, in life in general, you will lose more than you'll win.
Amra Pajalic (03:52)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (03:53)
And and I always use I love using examples that are more easy to understand. And there's this one thing that all high-performing athletes all share around the world, and that is love for the game. You ask tennis players, basketball players, football players, rugby players, athletes, you ask them why do you do what you do? They will all tell you.
What else would I be doing? I love this thing.
Amra Pajalic (04:14)
Mm. Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (04:15)
I, Vincent, love this thing called life. My life, I love everything about it. From the moment I wake up to the moment I go to bed, the adversity, the challenges, the obstacles, the espresso in the morning, the conversation right now, the the business, every single bit. You cannot do what I do if you do not love what you do. A second thing they all share is they know losing is.
part of the game. A couple of months ago there was the World Cup, highest competition in football.
I can guarantee you there's not a single player that got eliminated from the World Cup, maybe even lost the final, and that then told himself the day after, you know what? I'm done with this. I'm
Amra Pajalic (04:56)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (04:57)
I'm a quit. Not a single. And we're talking the highest competition on the highest level. Losing
Amra Pajalic (05:03)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (05:04)
is just and we got so good, especially in 2026. By the way, with Gen Z coming up,
Amra Pajalic (05:09)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (05:09)
we got so good at stigmatizing.
Failure and losing is bad and failure is not something to do and judgment got so big and we love pretending and lying to ourselves, like come on, what are we doing?
Amra Pajalic (05:24)
Yeah. Yeah. I think that's 'cause like I'm a as a as a writer, I've been doing this for three decades. And I'm at the point now where I don't care how, you know, what the metrics are, what the sales are, what the downloads are, any of that. All I care is that I'm just doing what I want to do, that I have the idea, that I have the inspiration, that I'm putting it out there. And so that for me is success. because as you as you're saying, in a sense, if you don't try
If you don't put yourself out there, you never know what you're capable of. You never know what what will happen, how you know, things might open up for you and what doors might open. So I love the way that you're talking about that. I can relate to that so much.
Viincent Van den Broeck (06:04)
The
the thing is the thing is when exactly I love what you just said because exactly that when you do something truly for yourself, not for your not for your daughter, not for your family, not for your friends, not for society, truly for yourself, it doesn't matter what happens. It doesn't matter what people say, the metrics do not matter. Because
Amra Pajalic (06:24)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (06:25)
you already wake up excited and you go to bed
Amra Pajalic (06:27)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (06:27)
at peace.
And that's what
Amra Pajalic (06:28)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (06:29)
you're trying to chase in life. No no it doesn't matter what it looked like.
Amra Pajalic (06:32)
Mm mm. are you okay if we're able to walk back to that day on the eleventh of october two thousand twenty four? what's the last thing you remember before the accident and the first thing after?
Viincent Van den Broeck (06:48)
Again, it's not that wow kind of effect. So what I do remember is I had breakfast in the morning with my wife for the second time that week, which was kind of special because I was working all the time. she was abroad for quite some time for work too. that was the second time that week and we were like, my god, breakfast again, how special. Just to give you a reminder of the Vincent from before the accent, I was working all the time. And then I asked her because we had an
Catering event for the business in the evening. I asked her to be there with me just to spend some, even if it was a job, we could spend some more time together.
Amra Pajalic (07:22)
Uh-huh.
Viincent Van den Broeck (07:23)
I left the scene earlier because I had an important finish to five to finish salary for the business. I remember telling her that she's the most important thing that ever happened to me in my life. Walked away,
Amra Pajalic (07:34)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (07:34)
she called me back, had this conversation with myself, like, no, you really need to go. Decided to walk back, anyways.
looked her in the eyes and tell her, I love you more than anything in this life. Never forget that. Kissed her. left.
Amra Pajalic (07:46)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (07:47)
And I remember being on my way to the Hoxton hotel here in the center of Brussels to finish that file. And then no more memories.
Amra Pajalic (07:54)
Mm. Mm-hmm. I love that
Viincent Van den Broeck (07:56)
And
Amra Pajalic (07:56)
you you had that moment that you like really connected with her and really showed that. I I have this thing because my mother suffered from bipolar and she was kind of not
present as much. So I have this thing where every day I have to tell my daughter that I love her because that's something I didn't hear enough. and I just love that that, you know, you had that moment where
you said that and you had that connection on on what turned out to be one of the worst days, possibly the worst day ever that will happen. You know, I'm qualifying that because I'm I'm at the point now in my life I've had a lot of worst days in my life because tragedies come as as we continue on in life, you know, just you live
Viincent Van den Broeck (08:40)
Yeah.
Amra Pajalic (08:40)
long enough and and things happen that that you have to survive. So, you know, it becomes a sort
of
There's a lot of things that happen to us. So yeah, it's one of, possibly. now you were given less than one percent chance of survival. Is there a moment, either yours or someone else's, from those three three weeks that you've since had to piece together second hand?
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:02)
The thing is like the I think no the the odds were it was ten percent chance of survival, but it was the one percent of full recovery because survival was considered the bare minimum.
Amra Pajalic (09:15)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:15)
You have to know that the narrative already in coma was your husband is probably gonna die. Start preparing the funeral.
Amra Pajalic (09:20)
Yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:21)
That was the it was everyday bad news. And it was every
Amra Pajalic (09:23)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:24)
day hoping that one day he'll wake up until the day I woke up. and then
The most optimistic news was should he ever wake up, he'll probably be a plant for the rest of his life. And
Amra Pajalic (09:35)
Oof.
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:35)
it was until the MRI scan they did, I think three or four days before me waking up, that it was confirmed that there were no major damages on the brain. Which
Amra Pajalic (09:47)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:48)
my wife's which my wife until this day says that it was even a more beautiful moment than me waking up, because that confirmed that I would be
the regular Vincent again. Like
Amra Pajalic (09:58)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:59)
it was, it was I didn't go through the worst. I was literally just sleeping for three weeks. For them it
Amra Pajalic (10:04)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (10:04)
was bad news on bad news. There were the first surgeries, then there were complications, second and third surgery, then I caught a 40 degree fever. they had to put me on ice blankets. Then my surgeon had to come one day into my room to drill. You even see the hole still over here, to drain
Amra Pajalic (10:23)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (10:23)
more blood.
From it was it was terrible. It was really it was
not a cool, a cool time to be alive, at least for them. At least for them.
So and then and then it was one percent of me talking to you right now, that was one percent.
Amra Pajalic (10:37)
Yeah, yeah, which
is which is amazing. One of the things that I've noticed that you're saying is like it wasn't this cinematic experience. Like do you think that in a sense in a lot of movies and a lot of, you know, perhaps entertainment, this story of I nearly died and then I found my life and found meaning of my life is kind of trivializing these sort of things.
Viincent Van den Broeck (10:59)
It just sells better.
Amra Pajalic (11:00)
Yeah, 'cause I'm I'm feeling that. I'm I'm getting to the point now where I'm getting a little bit tired of you know, I I had to get cancer to live again and to find my purpose and my life. and so I'm just flicking off those. I'm like, no, thank you. I I don't want that. I want the things that actually have the depth and meaning and then that true connection. yeah, so it it kind of becomes that miraculous, I don't know, transformation. And and and like that's the difference with you.
There was already that knowledge beforehand of everything that you had that that held meaning. It was just going back to it and and returning to it and continuing. And so one of the things that you said is that the accident didn't change your values. It tested them. And, you know, that's sort of what we're talking about. so you were finding out who you already were. So in one sense, you talked about the resilience and and being able to deal with things. What are some other things that you were talking about in terms of
returning to who you already were.
Viincent Van den Broeck (11:51)
There's a there's a lot out there. Again, just to confirm that you cannot do what I did if everything that was there wasn't there. It's impossible. Literally it it was it was attitude, it was the way you see it was perspective, it was being kind, it was not being afraid of
chasing something delusional, it was my support system, it was so many things. Literally it was
Almost as if the Vincent from before the accident took the Vincent from the accident by his hand and was like, Come on, bro, you can do this. You did this multiple times already. This is just another bump in the road. Come on. Lich it was literally that.
Amra Pajalic (12:33)
Mm. Yeah. I think when you've gone through those those difficult times, it tests you, but it does it does also clarify your core values and and it just brings
Viincent Van den Broeck (12:43)
Thank you.
Amra Pajalic (12:44)
you back.
Viincent Van den Broeck (12:44)
Because what did change though is before the accident, I just did it because it was the right thing to do, in my opinion. I wasn't
Amra Pajalic (12:51)
Mm. Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (12:53)
I wasn't facing adversity because I wanted to f no, it just bec seemed to me like the right thing to do. And so when writing the book and going through everything I went through, I was like, I became more conscious about everything.
Now now
I'm like literally chasing those things because I know they helped me do what was considered impossible. And
Amra Pajalic (13:15)
Mm mm mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (13:16)
so what I encourage also people to do is like you do not have to go through what I went through.
To be able to get the most out of life.
Amra Pajalic (13:25)
Mm, mm. So in a sense, don't wait for that tragedy, for that near death experience to find what truly matters. Discover it now.
Viincent Van den Broeck (13:34)
Exactly.
Amra Pajalic (13:35)
Yeah, yeah, I love that. That is just beautiful. So I had a question. If the accident had happened to you at twenty two before the bankruptcy, before rebuilding, before losing your mum, do you think you'd have come out the other side believing the same thing? Or do you think those earliest tests
they were what really helped push through this and and deal with this. 'Cause you were talking about resilience
Viincent Van den Broeck (13:57)
100
Amra Pajalic (13:57)
being a muscle.
Viincent Van den Broeck (13:58)
100% the the outcome would have been way different. By the way, on on that, I started following a 17-year-old patient that got into a tragic accident. Anyways, he got paralyzed. And I've been telling my wife, like, I was so lucky that it happened to me when I was 32. Like I already built life experience, I built my support system. In his case, he's going through some tough times.
And he does by definition do not have the same live experience. He does not have the same support system that I so yeah, of course.
Amra Pajalic (14:32)
U
Viincent Van den Broeck (14:32)
it literally came at the right moment almost.
Amra Pajalic (14:36)
Mm mm.
And that's that's the important thing that I just sort of wanted to explore more in terms of those support networks. Because that's what you know, when I was I was reading the book, that was what I was really struck by, these deep connections that you had in the community. 'cause you're a chef and and you've been building businesses and and had all of that. And like how important, like what do you think is how do you do that? Like what what's the way that we build those networks?
What is it that matters?
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:04)
I'm gonna make it real easy for you. You're you're just nice. Not
Amra Pajalic (15:08)
Yeah. Yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:09)
nice to want something in you you do not give to want something
Amra Pajalic (15:11)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:12)
in return. You're just a nice person. Like
Amra Pajalic (15:14)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:15)
you the conversation I have with management, for example, in the first conversation we're having is not numbers based. It is being nice to this person when they're cleaning the the streets in front of the restaurant.
Offer them a coffee. You just you're literally just something nice, someone nice to be around. You're someone kind.
Amra Pajalic (15:32)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:33)
You help people without wanting something in return. And you what beautiful
Amra Pajalic (15:37)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:37)
thing? When you give to the universe, eventually you'll get. You have to know by the way, that and this are and these are facts. When I was in coma, there were lines outside of ICU. When I say lines,
Amra Pajalic (15:48)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:49)
hundreds of people. I'm talking clients of the restaurant.
people that I saw one time, catering clients, strangers, parents from students that worked with us. The those those kind of things happen because yeah, because you leave a footprint behind you.
Amra Pajalic (16:07)
Mm. Yeah, I think that's that's what I love like that is so important. As a writer, you know, I work in all these different areas and there's all about networking, so you network, and people misunderstand networking where it's what you you know, in terms of I'll get to know you so you can do something for me. And it's like, no, networking is you get to know people, you enjoy talking to them, you forge a connection and then
things will develop organically. It's not about you will serve this need for me and therefore, you know, we will we will do that. and so that's that's what it's coming back to, that kindness being a person who being the person that you want other people to be. Like, you know, just model by by your behaviour, by your own values and then you will attract those people back to you.
Viincent Van den Broeck (16:57)
Thank you. The thing is like there should never be a hidden agenda. It's let's let's take a super easy example. This conversation. Literally this conversation. I'm not doing this conversation for it to bring major book sales.
Amra Pajalic (17:11)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (17:11)
I do this conversation because I true sincerely love all the topics we're talking about.
Amra Pajalic (17:18)
Mm, mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (17:19)
It this conversation literally made my day already.
Amra Pajalic (17:21)
Yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (17:21)
And I'm big on the fact that when you will walk away from this conversation, you'll be like, my, this Vincent guy has such an amazing conversation. Again, without any hidden agenda. And I'm
Amra Pajalic (17:33)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (17:34)
big on the fact that when you see Vincent on Instagram and you see him walking through the streets of Brussels, you see him on the job, you see him in this conversation, he's authentic. He's real to himself.
Amra Pajalic (17:43)
Mm.
Mm. I love that.
Viincent Van den Broeck (17:47)
That is what it's all about.
And you know what you'll attract eventually? What what you give? What you give.
Amra Pajalic (17:53)
Yes.
Yeah, so true. And like these days, the authenticity is is so important because we we have our lives online and we're sort of giving away so much of ourselves and it's very easy to kind of see do the f pieces fit together? Is it, you know, that that authentic picture? I mean there is an element we do present the shiny lives on social media in some ways.
Viincent Van den Broeck (18:19)
Mm-hmm.
Amra Pajalic (18:19)
But,
you know, we also do present the the reality of of who we are because that's also important. because that's part of that connection. It's not just about the shiny moments.
Viincent Van den Broeck (18:30)
Listen, the only person you're fooling is yourself.
And I can guarantee you, keep on lying to yourself, keep on pretending. One day you'll wake up with so much regret, you're not ready. I tell this, I work with Gen Z since forever. Literally. 90% of our team team are Gen Z. And I tell this all the time to them stop lying to yourself. Stop pretend you might think that you're the exception on the rule. And and that is why I always use this example. It's like going for a workout. We all
Amra Pajalic (18:58)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (18:59)
Truly know if we went all in or not. But what do we
Amra Pajalic (19:02)
Mm, mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (19:03)
do? We post a picture in the gym bone, put it on Instagram, hoping for some likes,
Amra Pajalic (19:06)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (19:07)
for some comments, for some views. And again, I'm not saying it's a bad thing to do, neither,
Amra Pajalic (19:12)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (19:12)
but just as soon as you can start being honest towards yourself. Are you able to look at yourself in the mirror and be like, my God, I'm truly living my life?
Amra Pajalic (19:22)
Yes. Yeah. 'Cause time moves on. Yeah. Time
Viincent Van den Broeck (19:23)
That's what it's all about, huh? Yeah, time moves on.
Amra Pajalic (19:26)
moves on. Like one one of the things I made important in my life because my mother's illness and her life was very much constrained because of her mental illness and the lack of opportunities she had and the lack of, you know, education that she had 'cause she was just always battling. Every day was just a battle.
to try and have something resembling, you know, a a life because her brain was always doing things. And so I've always made it a goal, what am I doing in in you know, in this year that I will look back on and be proud of and be happy with. Because time just kind of keeps going. It keeps moving on. And if if you just sort of start thinking, what's this snapshot that I'm doing? What's this moment? They just all add up.
And since I've I've really thoughtfully started doing that, I have a page on my website that I do, you know, news and events and and milestones and then I use that as my reflection at the end of the year. I'm like, it it adds up. There's you know, you're doing these little little things and then you
Viincent Van den Broeck (20:28)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (20:28)
suddenly look back with a zoom lens and you're like, that's that was pretty interesting. so yeah, you do have to like just enjoy the moments.
Viincent Van den Broeck (20:37)
Is by the way what the book is all about. It is
Amra Pajalic (20:39)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (20:40)
it is like major change always happens in the small daily habits, small tiny
Amra Pajalic (20:47)
Yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (20:47)
decisions, and you keep on stacking them. And all of a sudden, and again, an easy example to understand, it's working out. Like I've been working out since I left rehab, right now, seven days a week. Do you see the results?
The day after? No, but I can tell look at me now. The accident
Amra Pajalic (21:03)
Mm mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:05)
we we we would say that it was 10 years ago. That doesn't happen overnight. It's
Amra Pajalic (21:08)
Mm mm. Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:11)
always small bit and they're annoying because they're tiring. And the and the thing is, the example I always like to use is the negative impact of not doing them is literally this. Your life will still be pretty decent.
You still have some people that will like you. Bills will probably be paid. So it's just this. That's why we love
Amra Pajalic (21:31)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:32)
staying here. But there we gets interesting, the positive impact of doing those small, tiny, daily things is this. You're not even
Amra Pajalic (21:40)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:41)
able to see it on camera. And
Amra Pajalic (21:43)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:44)
being here, you will only see it when you start doing. And that's why we always we we all love to stay here because it's
Amra Pajalic (21:51)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:51)
just okay.
You know what? Until one day, it won't be anymore. my god,
Amra Pajalic (21:55)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:56)
why did I didn't I do more? Why didn't I do that? Regret.
I'm afraid of regret, by the way. I'm so afraid of it.
Amra Pajalic (22:03)
So you find that's a big motivation for you in terms of decisions that you're making every day?
Viincent Van den Broeck (22:08)
one hundred percent my biggest motivation is just literally
Being me, like being able to consciously tell myself, like, hey, I'm happy.
Amra Pajalic (22:17)
U
Viincent Van den Broeck (22:17)
Even in even in we would not even be talking if it wouldn't make me happy.
Amra Pajalic (22:22)
Mm, mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (22:23)
So I consciously decide every single moment that I'm doing what I love to do. And you know what? Okay, of course I do things that I kind of hate because part of the business, part of life,
but most of the time I'm just doing things that I love to do.
Like,
Amra Pajalic (22:36)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (22:37)
remember when we were kids and we were just so excited to start a day, like, mom, dad, let's wake up. No, let's start a day. And then at the end of the day, it was just you were tired. It was you were done. It was enough. Ready to go to bed.
Amra Pajalic (22:51)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (22:51)
When did when did we stop being kids? Like I'm literally a kid in an adult body with adult responsibilities. But the way
I move through life as a kid, I'm excited
to start my day.
Amra Pajalic (23:03)
Yes.
I have to say that's something I've really focused on also. Like, you know, I had that little bit of a midlife crisis, where I have battled my body and my hormones going through perimenopause and I am now just striving for joy and just trying to do things where I am just living consciously with joy.
and there's all these things that I do on a weekly basis. I bake bread every week, I bake a cake every week, or biscuits, I have my garden, I water every day and my plants. And like those are the things that, you know, it's those daily habits, is those daily moments that really create that meaning. we have fantastical moments in our life also, but those are rare. We need to
Viincent Van den Broeck (23:50)
Mm-hmm.
Amra Pajalic (23:50)
get the joy from the everyday.
Viincent Van den Broeck (23:52)
Yeah.
Amra Pajalic (23:53)
and live like a kid, as you said, and and really, you know, treasure the moments that we have because like you, I've had days where my life changed in an instant and tragedy came and dealing with years o of of grief and trauma from those moments. and
It's it's horrible but like it it really you makes you realise how that can happen at any moment and not to take things for granted. because they they just that's life. and sometimes you have these cinematic moments in life where you're like, That shouldn't happen, like, you know, you walking to work and and just being hit by a a a e scooter and you know, that you had this beautiful moment with your wife just before it happened.
But they do. That is why, you know, we do have those moments in cinema because they are
Viincent Van den Broeck (24:44)
Yeah.
Amra Pajalic (24:44)
real in that way.
Viincent Van den Broeck (24:46)
You figured out
life by the way by the way, you figured out life, huh? On it on everything you said
Amra Pajalic (24:50)
Ugh.
Viincent Van den Broeck (24:51)
in the past twenty minutes, you figured out life. Literally.
Amra Pajalic (24:54)
Vincent, like you, I've had a lot of tragedy. So the last thing that happened was my stepfather committed suicide and then eleven months
Viincent Van den Broeck (25:03)
Mm, sorry.
Amra Pajalic (25:04)
later my mother passed away. And it was like it you know, one of those days where you just wake up and you're doing your day to day.
And then suddenly in a moment your whole life is changed. And I just remember driving in the car and going, This can't be my life. This can't be my life. Just that that disbelief. And then once these things happen, you're like, Well, this is it, this is what life is.
Viincent Van den Broeck (25:31)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (25:32)
That these things happen to you. They don't happen to other people, they happen to you. and I've had quite a few of those. and
It really puts things into perspective.
Viincent Van den Broeck (25:41)
Always,
always.
Amra Pajalic (25:42)
Mm.
Yeah. yeah. So I wanted to go back a little bit and talk about the rebuild, and you know, you were learning to walk again, hold a fork. You've said that the first fifty meters unaided felt bigger than opening a business ever had. What does that do to your definition of achievement?
Viincent Van den Broeck (26:00)
I even posted on it on Instagram a while ago. It's funny how ambition can change from opening more restaurants to just being healthy.
Amra Pajalic (26:08)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (26:08)
Literally like it, I'm even more I've always been non-negotiable about my own happiness, but I'm even bigger right now on all that. I'm
black and white when it comes to my own happiness. Literally, if should I wake up tomorrow and hate the going to the restaurant, I leave the place on the spot. Should
Amra Pajalic (26:28)
Mm. Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (26:30)
I wake up?
tomorrow and not be happy anymore in my apartment, which I love by the way.
Amra Pajalic (26:36)
Yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (26:36)
I'm I I move. I'm
Amra Pajalic (26:38)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (26:39)
not black and white when it comes to when it comes to those wins. And it and of course I saw it from very close how even the small things can become really big. But again it's it's funny how the brain works because brain is very good at forgetting trauma.
Amra Pajalic (26:55)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (26:56)
It sticks with you for a while, but even even myself, like the accident scene like ages ago. Like I do not vividly I of course rationally I remember the things I went through, but I do not vividly remember those tragic moments like not being able to eat by myself or walk. Like right now I'm running and I'm not thinking. I what I do what I do though is I remind myself when I'm
Ready to so I'm working out and I'm ready to quit. I tell my bro, two years ago you were not able to work, go further, push
Amra Pajalic (27:28)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (27:28)
yourself more. So I would remind myself, I would always there we all have this inner voice negative inner voice in our minds. And what I always say is you just need to talk louder than that voice. And that is what I do on a on a of course I have doubts, of course I question myself sometimes, of course I have tough moments. I just talk louder to my
And I do not mean talking out loud, but I'm just reminding my stop stop whip complaining. Go further. Push more. Let's go. Just talk louder.
Amra Pajalic (27:57)
Mm, yeah, I mean that self talk is just so important. I've been seeing a lot of things popping up on social media and I've been doing a lot of articulating to myself. So I I actually sort of talked to talk myself through things.
Viincent Van den Broeck (28:11)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (28:12)
and I've noticed that lately I've been, you know, the past few years as I've I've rebuilt after my my personal tragedies, and they also I had health issues that
you know, developed as a result of those. as you get kinder to yourself, it also gets better. You know, like sometimes we we seem to I don't know, we can show kindness to other people, but to ourselves we seem to have these expectations and and the way that we sort of tell ourselves about things. and
Viincent Van den Broeck (28:38)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (28:38)
I've noticed that when I'm as I've been kinder to myself and and, you know, I I'm disappointed sometimes in terms of I haven't done this or et cetera, et cetera. But then when I'm like, well, you've done that
you've done the other thing, like don't go into putting down, go into what has been achieved, what has been done.
Viincent Van den Broeck (28:56)
Yeah.
Amra Pajalic (28:56)
it really helps.
Viincent Van den Broeck (28:57)
There's three things I I also posted on it recently. There's three things I encourage every if you wanna see big change, there's three simple things that you can do on a daily basis. One, talk positive about yourself, two, think highly of yourself, three, choose gratitude every single day. That's simple. And you know what? In the beginning, pretend someone asks you, you do not feel great. no, I'm doing great.
The the power of words, the power of thoughts you could not even imagine. By the way, thoughts influence speech. Speech speech influences behavior. Behavior will always influence life. In both directions, negative or positive.
Amra Pajalic (29:39)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (29:39)
Literally.
Amra Pajalic (29:40)
And that's so true, 'cause like, you know, at work it's like, How are you doing? And a few years ago I would always be going for the whinging for the the thing that's annoying me or the things that's not okay. Whereas now I'm like, Well, it's a Friday. Well, I've got this, well I've got that. And so it's just reframing into that positive. it shifts me out of it and and it has been keeping me in a much calmer state.
and it really is important. It really does matter because I see people who choose that negative who always kind of go into that negative mindset. and and they're not kind to themselves and they're not kind to other people either. because of that, because they've got that space in their head.
Viincent Van den Broeck (30:23)
Up it's that simple. And again, the conversation is never about it being easy or it being difficult. You know what? Beautiful things in life are supposed to be difficult, but it's that simple. Like we love to overcomplicate. Yeah, but those two words, I hate them. Yeah, but yep. Stop using them already.
Amra Pajalic (30:42)
Yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (30:42)
It is supposed to be the most beautiful views in life.
Come after the most toughest climbs.
Amra Pajalic (30:49)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (30:49)
And
that you know what? And that we accept. We're ready to go to Bali, climb a mountain at four AM in the morning to go look a view. Go see
Amra Pajalic (30:57)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (30:57)
a view. Like, come on, what are we doing? But for ourselves? All of a sudden that's life is supposed to be easy. Like who are we kidding?
Amra Pajalic (31:05)
Yes. And I think that I don't know, personally for me, growing up with a a difficult childhood, and the perspective that it gave me, because I had a lot of uncertainty and a lot of, you know, foster homes and moving around and no stability.
And so for me being a grown up was the best thing in the world. It's like I pay my bills, I choose where I live, I choose what I do with my day. Those are all really important decisions because when you are a child and you are at the mercy of unpredictable adults and unpredictable life, it really, you know, creates a a lot of of, you know, noise
in your head.
Viincent Van den Broeck (31:45)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (31:46)
and then I I remember when I I started because I I moved out of home when I was quite young, nineteen and a lot of people are like, paying bills and this is hard. I'm like, This is awesome. This is the best thing ever. I'm a grown up. No one can make decisions for me. I do it. It's great
It was just such a different perspective. I just remember I'm like, why are you why is this a bad thing? I don't understand.
still love building businesses and chasing ambition goals. You haven't renounced ambition but it's indifferent in how you relate to your success now. So now it seems to be more about happiness and things, you know, they have to do more than just be about ambition and about success and how
other people look at you, it's more about your joy and your you know, how you feel about it. Do you think that's an accurate shift?
Viincent Van den Broeck (32:37)
It was always about that. The thing is priorities have changed. Like I remember missing my sister daughter's four first birthdays and I remember and it was just before the accident of my sister sending videos in the group chat of them being dressed as princesses for their birthdays and I was opening the restaurant and I started falling into tears.
That I'm never doing again. I'm never missing any single birthday. I'm never missing out on barbecues with the family anymore. We eat every single night together, my wife and I, which would never have happened before the accident. So it was already really important. Like the joy was also really important before the accident. The thing I was so focused on getting us into a better situation with the business that I lost track of.
All the other things that are also important more important. So it's just a priority shift. Same for the working out, like almost never worked out before the accident. Right now it became a non-negotiable. I'm working out literally every single day. So there's just it's literally a priority shift. And that is, you know what? And that is what life is about. Like don't I'm only 34. Back then I was 32.
So and you know what? And the Vincent in from 10 years from now we'll probably be different. We'll probably be doing different things from let alone 20 years from now. And it always goes back to the most important thing. And what I preach all the time is just you being honest towards yourself, you living a life without any regret, you being able to tell yourself at your very last moment I did everything I wanted to do.
And I said everything I wanted to say, which by the way could have happened when I was 32.
Amra Pajalic (34:15)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (34:15)
Did I want to travel more? Did I want to spend more time with family? Yeah, of course. But life is life. You make choice. Life is made out of decisions, and you that have to live with them. And I was at peace with my decisions. I chose to build businesses. And you know what? Okay, COVID came along, and then I got business partners that then
Sorry for the word, but fucked me, which cost me a lot of money. Okay, life is life. Boo hoo.
Amra Pajalic (34:40)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (34:43)
But I was at peace working every day. It fulfilled me. And
Amra Pajalic (34:47)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (34:48)
being tonight is my aunt's birthday. I will be there. And you know what?
Amra Pajalic (34:52)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (34:53)
Should there be business problems tonight, okay? They will be fixed tomorrow.
Amra Pajalic (34:56)
Mm, mm. I think that's the thing. We kinda get so caught up in those external things, and make them too important. And it's like, no, they can wait. That that's okay.
Viincent Van den Broeck (35:06)
Mm-hmm.
Amra Pajalic (35:07)
Yeah, I love that. so this book, I comes out on the two year anniversary. D was that deliberate or did it just kinda happen where the writing process developed and then you're like, Okay, we're gonna set it for that date?
Viincent Van den Broeck (35:20)
no, it it is ready since a year already. The
or at least beginning of this year. It was
Amra Pajalic (35:26)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (35:26)
already ready to be published. The thing for me it was important because recovery was supposed to take two years. That was a narrative back in the hospital to to my wife. They was like, Yeah, okay, recovery will probably take two years. Guess what? It took two months and a half. So I wanted it to be full circle. So
Amra Pajalic (35:43)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (35:43)
instead of being done with rehab, I'm publishing my book.
Amra Pajalic (35:46)
Mm.
Mm. So that's in a sense a celebration of that journey and of that rebuild for yourself. Yeah. That's
Viincent Van den Broeck (35:52)
Celebration. Celebration
of life. And you know what? It's
To the core, I'm someone that wants the best. I want everybody to win. You'll get advice even if you didn't ask for it. I will help you for whatever, whenever. And so for me, it is literally to prove people, you see, you can do this. Whatever you're
chasing, you're able. I just wanted it to be full. I wanted it, I wanted it to be that I wanted it to be a magical moment, like sparkling around.
Amra Pajalic (36:22)
Mm you wanted to leave that feeling. I actually was reading your book and I loved that that the end what you finished with were kind of lessons and and mantras and and you know things that people you know to to make people think. And I remember going through that list and just feeling this like little like moment of t you know, just connection where I'm like, yes, yes, that's that's that's the one. so
From my perspective you succeeded in that. You you
Viincent Van den Broeck (36:51)
Wow.
Amra Pajalic (36:51)
created that sort of a journey and that that sense of, you know, here is a little pocket full of wisdom for you, to walk away with.
Viincent Van den Broeck (37:00)
wow.
You you literally you literally made my day already. Wait, did you read the the whole book?
Amra Pajalic (37:07)
Yeah, I read it. I was reading it quickly though because I was
Viincent Van den Broeck (37:09)
Globally. Yeah.
Amra Pajalic (37:10)
like, yeah. so I got I got the gist and then when I I I was like, okay, yeah, yeah. And then I got to that part and I was like, I'm really I don't know, just 'cause it was like a little life lessons and it was you talking about how it just reconfirms things for you and these were the things that it reconfirmed. and I was just like, Yes.
and I've actually like you how we were talking earlier about this interview, I've actually been telling people, I'm like, I'm gonna be interviewing this really cool guy. this is what happened to him. I'm just like, I can't wait. It's gonna like I'm just already so fascinated.
Viincent Van den Broeck (37:45)
wow.
Amra Pajalic (37:46)
and people are like, Wow, that sounds really interesting. I'm like, Yes, it is, it's really interesting. and this is the thing, you know, we we love stories, we love hearing about people's journeys and and we love
thinking about, you know, how what what can we get from that and this whole podcast is premised on that. It's on people telling their stories and what are the lessons that we can get from it. because this is what I love doing. I love listening to, you know, media, to watching things
and and just
Viincent Van den Broeck (38:16)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (38:17)
walking away with a a moment, you know, a thought, a new idea.
and you know, yeah, so I I found that that's what I loved about it too. so you
Viincent Van den Broeck (38:29)
Right.
Amra Pajalic (38:30)
s y you said why not me is the question you want to leave readers with. what's something you're rec you're currently asking that of in your own life right now? Why not me?
Viincent Van den Broeck (38:41)
Traveling global with this message.
Amra Pajalic (38:44)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (38:44)
Bringing positivity to as many places as possible. Bringing the book, the story, the wisdom, the the the the journey, the conversations to as many places as possible.
Amra Pajalic (38:57)
I love that. That's beautiful.
Viincent Van den Broeck (38:57)
Which is by the way gonna is
which is by the way gonna happen. I'm speaking it into existence.
Amra Pajalic (39:01)
Well, you have to. I mean the thing is we have to be our own advocates and also we kinda have to believe like when I start writing a book, I believe that book is going to change the world in some way. That's what I built. So when I was writing my memoir, Things Nobody Knows But Me, I was like, I am writing about being parented by a mother who has bipolar and a mother
Viincent Van den Broeck (39:23)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (39:23)
who is from a non English speaking background who doesn't understand her mental illness. And
That got me through five years of writing and going to therapy and, you know, really exploring the darkness of of a lot of moments. And then when it went out into the world, I I got that. I had readers read it and connect with me and feel seen
Viincent Van den Broeck (39:47)
Wow.
Amra Pajalic (39:48)
and and have those moments and this is what memoir does. This is what sharing, you know, these
things and and these stories and these moments that have happened to us. So I really believe that you are, you know, already doing that and you will continue doing that.
Viincent Van den Broeck (40:04)
Thank you. Thank you.
Amra Pajalic (40:05)
So I'm very excited for you. And I just wanted to ask one last thing. If someone listening is in their own version of one day, one day I'll slow down, one day I'll call that person, one day I'll start, what's the one honest question you want them to ask themselves tonight?
Viincent Van den Broeck (40:23)
Mm.
First of all, be truly honest. If it's kinda or I think that's a no. You do not want that. The question is, the simple question is, do I really want this?
Mia, you by yourself. Take away the money, take away your parents, take away your family, take away your kids, take away your current situation, take away the past and the future. In this moment, is this what I really want? Yeah, binary. Yes, no. Kinda, I think it's a no.
Say something different.
Amra Pajalic (40:54)
Yeah, yeah. Like have that courage to try because we don't know we don't know what's gonna happen on a day to day basis. We've had those one days that everything's changed, yeah. So where can listeners find you and learn more about your book?
Viincent Van den Broeck (41:12)
Yeah, the book is the it's already up by the way for pre-orders right now. You can buy it on Amazon. It's Vincent in the Kitchen on Instagram, on TikTok, on YouTube. And honestly, I just love to talk to people. So if you want to talk about whatever, whenever it's Vincent in the Kitchen on all platforms. And please do. No hidden agenda.
Amra Pajalic (41:32)
Beautiful. Thank you so much for reaching out to me and thank you for this beautiful conversation and this beautiful moment. and I I am just so looking forward to as your book comes out seeing all the things that you achieve with it.
Viincent Van den Broeck (41:47)
Thank you. Thank you, Amra for real. It has been it was amazing. Thank you.
Amra Pajalic (41:51)
Thank you.
Welcome to Amra's Armchair Anecdotes. Today I have Vincent van den Brock, who spent his 20s and 30s building and opening multiple hospitality businesses, working before dawn to after dark days, and measuring his weeks by output. On the 11th of October 2024, an e-scooter accident changed everything. He was struck at 55 kilometers in a 30 zone, suffered severe brain.
trauma and multiple fractures and spent three weeks in a coma. Doctors gave his family less than 1% chance he'd survive. He came back, relearning to walk, speak clearly and hold a knife and fork over three months of rehabilitation. But the story he tells isn't one of transformation. Long before the accident he'd already survived bankruptcy, rebuilt his life more than once and lost his mother young.
He'd learned that resilience isn't discovered in a crisis. It's built in the ordinary days before you need it. The accident didn't make him a different person. It tested at the highest possible stakes whether what he already believed was true. His book, Everything Feels Impossible Until It's Done, How the Life You Build Becomes the Life That Saves You, publishes 11th of October 2026.
exactly two years after the accident that nearly ended his life. Welcome, Vincent.
Viincent Van den Broeck (01:22)
That was that was for really good intro. Thank you so much for that. You already
Amra Pajalic (01:26)
Not a problem.
Viincent Van den Broeck (01:27)
right right now you already made my day. Thank you.
Amra Pajalic (01:30)
well I saw your email or I think someone sent an email and your story and I was just like, This is so interesting because what I really love is that angle. It's not I had a near death experience and that taught me how to live. It's instead I had a near death experience and it showed me that the life that I already have is one of meaning. Cause one of the things that I really got out of it that was beautiful was
That your businesses were still able to continue because you had this wonderful support network that you'd already built in the years preceding this. And I just found that so beautiful.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:07)
That's nice, huh? That's nice.
Amra Pajalic (02:09)
Yeah, yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:10)
It's you know what it's like it's less cinematic, like it's less exciting to say, but it's it's the truth. It's not like me waking up and be like, my god, I'm a different person.
So less exciting, but it is by the way, something I encourage everyone to to do. Like resilien the word we're talking about is resilience, which for
Amra Pajalic (02:32)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:32)
me is a muscle.
Amra Pajalic (02:34)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:34)
like any
other in your body, which can be trained. And the way I see the way you can train it or should train it is when you're going through something difficult, you
Amra Pajalic (02:44)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:44)
either decide to avoid or face. And the way you build
Amra Pajalic (02:48)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:49)
that muscle resilience is you just keep on facing it, facing it, facing it. And you know what? It will never get easier. You just make
Amra Pajalic (02:56)
Ooh.
Viincent Van den Broeck (02:57)
it look easier to the outside world.
Amra Pajalic (02:59)
Yes. And this is something that I'm I'm having big conversations about with my daughter who's seventeen years old and she's entering, you know, finishing high school and it's it's what what is her life going to be afterwards. And I'm like, you're feeling all of these big emotions and these big fears because this is the first big change in your life. But the more that you continue on and you have these big
You know, huge things happen in your life, the huge transitions, the more that you learn what you can deal with and how you can deal with it. and I think that's coming through your story because, you know, y you already had that basis of of being able to survive difficult things. So in one sense it was like this is what life is. This is what what it means to live.
Viincent Van den Broeck (03:47)
yeah, by the way, in life in general, you will lose more than you'll win.
Amra Pajalic (03:52)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (03:53)
And and I always use I love using examples that are more easy to understand. And there's this one thing that all high-performing athletes all share around the world, and that is love for the game. You ask tennis players, basketball players, football players, rugby players, athletes, you ask them why do you do what you do? They will all tell you.
What else would I be doing? I love this thing.
Amra Pajalic (04:14)
Mm. Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (04:15)
I, Vincent, love this thing called life. My life, I love everything about it. From the moment I wake up to the moment I go to bed, the adversity, the challenges, the obstacles, the espresso in the morning, the conversation right now, the the business, every single bit. You cannot do what I do if you do not love what you do. A second thing they all share is they know losing is.
part of the game. A couple of months ago there was the World Cup, highest competition in football.
I can guarantee you there's not a single player that got eliminated from the World Cup, maybe even lost the final, and that then told himself the day after, you know what? I'm done with this. I'm
Amra Pajalic (04:56)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (04:57)
I'm a quit. Not a single. And we're talking the highest competition on the highest level. Losing
Amra Pajalic (05:03)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (05:04)
is just and we got so good, especially in 2026. By the way, with Gen Z coming up,
Amra Pajalic (05:09)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (05:09)
we got so good at stigmatizing.
Failure and losing is bad and failure is not something to do and judgment got so big and we love pretending and lying to ourselves, like come on, what are we doing?
Amra Pajalic (05:24)
Yeah. Yeah. I think that's 'cause like I'm a as a as a writer, I've been doing this for three decades. And I'm at the point now where I don't care how, you know, what the metrics are, what the sales are, what the downloads are, any of that. All I care is that I'm just doing what I want to do, that I have the idea, that I have the inspiration, that I'm putting it out there. And so that for me is success. because as you as you're saying, in a sense, if you don't try
If you don't put yourself out there, you never know what you're capable of. You never know what what will happen, how you know, things might open up for you and what doors might open. So I love the way that you're talking about that. I can relate to that so much.
Viincent Van den Broeck (06:04)
The
the thing is the thing is when exactly I love what you just said because exactly that when you do something truly for yourself, not for your not for your daughter, not for your family, not for your friends, not for society, truly for yourself, it doesn't matter what happens. It doesn't matter what people say, the metrics do not matter. Because
Amra Pajalic (06:24)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (06:25)
you already wake up excited and you go to bed
Amra Pajalic (06:27)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (06:27)
at peace.
And that's what
Amra Pajalic (06:28)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (06:29)
you're trying to chase in life. No no it doesn't matter what it looked like.
Amra Pajalic (06:32)
Mm mm. are you okay if we're able to walk back to that day on the eleventh of october two thousand twenty four? what's the last thing you remember before the accident and the first thing after?
Viincent Van den Broeck (06:48)
Again, it's not that wow kind of effect. So what I do remember is I had breakfast in the morning with my wife for the second time that week, which was kind of special because I was working all the time. she was abroad for quite some time for work too. that was the second time that week and we were like, my god, breakfast again, how special. Just to give you a reminder of the Vincent from before the accent, I was working all the time. And then I asked her because we had an
Catering event for the business in the evening. I asked her to be there with me just to spend some, even if it was a job, we could spend some more time together.
Amra Pajalic (07:22)
Uh-huh.
Viincent Van den Broeck (07:23)
I left the scene earlier because I had an important finish to five to finish salary for the business. I remember telling her that she's the most important thing that ever happened to me in my life. Walked away,
Amra Pajalic (07:34)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (07:34)
she called me back, had this conversation with myself, like, no, you really need to go. Decided to walk back, anyways.
looked her in the eyes and tell her, I love you more than anything in this life. Never forget that. Kissed her. left.
Amra Pajalic (07:46)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (07:47)
And I remember being on my way to the Hoxton hotel here in the center of Brussels to finish that file. And then no more memories.
Amra Pajalic (07:54)
Mm. Mm-hmm. I love that
Viincent Van den Broeck (07:56)
And
Amra Pajalic (07:56)
you you had that moment that you like really connected with her and really showed that. I I have this thing because my mother suffered from bipolar and she was kind of not
present as much. So I have this thing where every day I have to tell my daughter that I love her because that's something I didn't hear enough. and I just love that that, you know, you had that moment where
you said that and you had that connection on on what turned out to be one of the worst days, possibly the worst day ever that will happen. You know, I'm qualifying that because I'm I'm at the point now in my life I've had a lot of worst days in my life because tragedies come as as we continue on in life, you know, just you live
Viincent Van den Broeck (08:40)
Yeah.
Amra Pajalic (08:40)
long enough and and things happen that that you have to survive. So, you know, it becomes a sort
of
There's a lot of things that happen to us. So yeah, it's one of, possibly. now you were given less than one percent chance of survival. Is there a moment, either yours or someone else's, from those three three weeks that you've since had to piece together second hand?
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:02)
The thing is like the I think no the the odds were it was ten percent chance of survival, but it was the one percent of full recovery because survival was considered the bare minimum.
Amra Pajalic (09:15)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:15)
You have to know that the narrative already in coma was your husband is probably gonna die. Start preparing the funeral.
Amra Pajalic (09:20)
Yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:21)
That was the it was everyday bad news. And it was every
Amra Pajalic (09:23)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:24)
day hoping that one day he'll wake up until the day I woke up. and then
The most optimistic news was should he ever wake up, he'll probably be a plant for the rest of his life. And
Amra Pajalic (09:35)
Oof.
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:35)
it was until the MRI scan they did, I think three or four days before me waking up, that it was confirmed that there were no major damages on the brain. Which
Amra Pajalic (09:47)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:48)
my wife's which my wife until this day says that it was even a more beautiful moment than me waking up, because that confirmed that I would be
the regular Vincent again. Like
Amra Pajalic (09:58)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (09:59)
it was, it was I didn't go through the worst. I was literally just sleeping for three weeks. For them it
Amra Pajalic (10:04)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (10:04)
was bad news on bad news. There were the first surgeries, then there were complications, second and third surgery, then I caught a 40 degree fever. they had to put me on ice blankets. Then my surgeon had to come one day into my room to drill. You even see the hole still over here, to drain
Amra Pajalic (10:23)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (10:23)
more blood.
From it was it was terrible. It was really it was
not a cool, a cool time to be alive, at least for them. At least for them.
So and then and then it was one percent of me talking to you right now, that was one percent.
Amra Pajalic (10:37)
Yeah, yeah, which
is which is amazing. One of the things that I've noticed that you're saying is like it wasn't this cinematic experience. Like do you think that in a sense in a lot of movies and a lot of, you know, perhaps entertainment, this story of I nearly died and then I found my life and found meaning of my life is kind of trivializing these sort of things.
Viincent Van den Broeck (10:59)
It just sells better.
Amra Pajalic (11:00)
Yeah, 'cause I'm I'm feeling that. I'm I'm getting to the point now where I'm getting a little bit tired of you know, I I had to get cancer to live again and to find my purpose and my life. and so I'm just flicking off those. I'm like, no, thank you. I I don't want that. I want the things that actually have the depth and meaning and then that true connection. yeah, so it it kind of becomes that miraculous, I don't know, transformation. And and and like that's the difference with you.
There was already that knowledge beforehand of everything that you had that that held meaning. It was just going back to it and and returning to it and continuing. And so one of the things that you said is that the accident didn't change your values. It tested them. And, you know, that's sort of what we're talking about. so you were finding out who you already were. So in one sense, you talked about the resilience and and being able to deal with things. What are some other things that you were talking about in terms of
returning to who you already were.
Viincent Van den Broeck (11:51)
There's a there's a lot out there. Again, just to confirm that you cannot do what I did if everything that was there wasn't there. It's impossible. Literally it it was it was attitude, it was the way you see it was perspective, it was being kind, it was not being afraid of
chasing something delusional, it was my support system, it was so many things. Literally it was
Almost as if the Vincent from before the accident took the Vincent from the accident by his hand and was like, Come on, bro, you can do this. You did this multiple times already. This is just another bump in the road. Come on. Lich it was literally that.
Amra Pajalic (12:33)
Mm. Yeah. I think when you've gone through those those difficult times, it tests you, but it does it does also clarify your core values and and it just brings
Viincent Van den Broeck (12:43)
Thank you.
Amra Pajalic (12:44)
you back.
Viincent Van den Broeck (12:44)
Because what did change though is before the accident, I just did it because it was the right thing to do, in my opinion. I wasn't
Amra Pajalic (12:51)
Mm. Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (12:53)
I wasn't facing adversity because I wanted to f no, it just bec seemed to me like the right thing to do. And so when writing the book and going through everything I went through, I was like, I became more conscious about everything.
Now now
I'm like literally chasing those things because I know they helped me do what was considered impossible. And
Amra Pajalic (13:15)
Mm mm mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (13:16)
so what I encourage also people to do is like you do not have to go through what I went through.
To be able to get the most out of life.
Amra Pajalic (13:25)
Mm, mm. So in a sense, don't wait for that tragedy, for that near death experience to find what truly matters. Discover it now.
Viincent Van den Broeck (13:34)
Exactly.
Amra Pajalic (13:35)
Yeah, yeah, I love that. That is just beautiful. So I had a question. If the accident had happened to you at twenty two before the bankruptcy, before rebuilding, before losing your mum, do you think you'd have come out the other side believing the same thing? Or do you think those earliest tests
they were what really helped push through this and and deal with this. 'Cause you were talking about resilience
Viincent Van den Broeck (13:57)
100
Amra Pajalic (13:57)
being a muscle.
Viincent Van den Broeck (13:58)
100% the the outcome would have been way different. By the way, on on that, I started following a 17-year-old patient that got into a tragic accident. Anyways, he got paralyzed. And I've been telling my wife, like, I was so lucky that it happened to me when I was 32. Like I already built life experience, I built my support system. In his case, he's going through some tough times.
And he does by definition do not have the same live experience. He does not have the same support system that I so yeah, of course.
Amra Pajalic (14:32)
U
Viincent Van den Broeck (14:32)
it literally came at the right moment almost.
Amra Pajalic (14:36)
Mm mm.
And that's that's the important thing that I just sort of wanted to explore more in terms of those support networks. Because that's what you know, when I was I was reading the book, that was what I was really struck by, these deep connections that you had in the community. 'cause you're a chef and and you've been building businesses and and had all of that. And like how important, like what do you think is how do you do that? Like what what's the way that we build those networks?
What is it that matters?
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:04)
I'm gonna make it real easy for you. You're you're just nice. Not
Amra Pajalic (15:08)
Yeah. Yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:09)
nice to want something in you you do not give to want something
Amra Pajalic (15:11)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:12)
in return. You're just a nice person. Like
Amra Pajalic (15:14)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:15)
you the conversation I have with management, for example, in the first conversation we're having is not numbers based. It is being nice to this person when they're cleaning the the streets in front of the restaurant.
Offer them a coffee. You just you're literally just something nice, someone nice to be around. You're someone kind.
Amra Pajalic (15:32)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:33)
You help people without wanting something in return. And you what beautiful
Amra Pajalic (15:37)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:37)
thing? When you give to the universe, eventually you'll get. You have to know by the way, that and this are and these are facts. When I was in coma, there were lines outside of ICU. When I say lines,
Amra Pajalic (15:48)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (15:49)
hundreds of people. I'm talking clients of the restaurant.
people that I saw one time, catering clients, strangers, parents from students that worked with us. The those those kind of things happen because yeah, because you leave a footprint behind you.
Amra Pajalic (16:07)
Mm. Yeah, I think that's that's what I love like that is so important. As a writer, you know, I work in all these different areas and there's all about networking, so you network, and people misunderstand networking where it's what you you know, in terms of I'll get to know you so you can do something for me. And it's like, no, networking is you get to know people, you enjoy talking to them, you forge a connection and then
things will develop organically. It's not about you will serve this need for me and therefore, you know, we will we will do that. and so that's that's what it's coming back to, that kindness being a person who being the person that you want other people to be. Like, you know, just model by by your behaviour, by your own values and then you will attract those people back to you.
Viincent Van den Broeck (16:57)
Thank you. The thing is like there should never be a hidden agenda. It's let's let's take a super easy example. This conversation. Literally this conversation. I'm not doing this conversation for it to bring major book sales.
Amra Pajalic (17:11)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (17:11)
I do this conversation because I true sincerely love all the topics we're talking about.
Amra Pajalic (17:18)
Mm, mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (17:19)
It this conversation literally made my day already.
Amra Pajalic (17:21)
Yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (17:21)
And I'm big on the fact that when you will walk away from this conversation, you'll be like, my, this Vincent guy has such an amazing conversation. Again, without any hidden agenda. And I'm
Amra Pajalic (17:33)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (17:34)
big on the fact that when you see Vincent on Instagram and you see him walking through the streets of Brussels, you see him on the job, you see him in this conversation, he's authentic. He's real to himself.
Amra Pajalic (17:43)
Mm.
Mm. I love that.
Viincent Van den Broeck (17:47)
That is what it's all about.
And you know what you'll attract eventually? What what you give? What you give.
Amra Pajalic (17:53)
Yes.
Yeah, so true. And like these days, the authenticity is is so important because we we have our lives online and we're sort of giving away so much of ourselves and it's very easy to kind of see do the f pieces fit together? Is it, you know, that that authentic picture? I mean there is an element we do present the shiny lives on social media in some ways.
Viincent Van den Broeck (18:19)
Mm-hmm.
Amra Pajalic (18:19)
But,
you know, we also do present the the reality of of who we are because that's also important. because that's part of that connection. It's not just about the shiny moments.
Viincent Van den Broeck (18:30)
Listen, the only person you're fooling is yourself.
And I can guarantee you, keep on lying to yourself, keep on pretending. One day you'll wake up with so much regret, you're not ready. I tell this, I work with Gen Z since forever. Literally. 90% of our team team are Gen Z. And I tell this all the time to them stop lying to yourself. Stop pretend you might think that you're the exception on the rule. And and that is why I always use this example. It's like going for a workout. We all
Amra Pajalic (18:58)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (18:59)
Truly know if we went all in or not. But what do we
Amra Pajalic (19:02)
Mm, mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (19:03)
do? We post a picture in the gym bone, put it on Instagram, hoping for some likes,
Amra Pajalic (19:06)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (19:07)
for some comments, for some views. And again, I'm not saying it's a bad thing to do, neither,
Amra Pajalic (19:12)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (19:12)
but just as soon as you can start being honest towards yourself. Are you able to look at yourself in the mirror and be like, my God, I'm truly living my life?
Amra Pajalic (19:22)
Yes. Yeah. 'Cause time moves on. Yeah. Time
Viincent Van den Broeck (19:23)
That's what it's all about, huh? Yeah, time moves on.
Amra Pajalic (19:26)
moves on. Like one one of the things I made important in my life because my mother's illness and her life was very much constrained because of her mental illness and the lack of opportunities she had and the lack of, you know, education that she had 'cause she was just always battling. Every day was just a battle.
to try and have something resembling, you know, a a life because her brain was always doing things. And so I've always made it a goal, what am I doing in in you know, in this year that I will look back on and be proud of and be happy with. Because time just kind of keeps going. It keeps moving on. And if if you just sort of start thinking, what's this snapshot that I'm doing? What's this moment? They just all add up.
And since I've I've really thoughtfully started doing that, I have a page on my website that I do, you know, news and events and and milestones and then I use that as my reflection at the end of the year. I'm like, it it adds up. There's you know, you're doing these little little things and then you
Viincent Van den Broeck (20:28)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (20:28)
suddenly look back with a zoom lens and you're like, that's that was pretty interesting. so yeah, you do have to like just enjoy the moments.
Viincent Van den Broeck (20:37)
Is by the way what the book is all about. It is
Amra Pajalic (20:39)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (20:40)
it is like major change always happens in the small daily habits, small tiny
Amra Pajalic (20:47)
Yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (20:47)
decisions, and you keep on stacking them. And all of a sudden, and again, an easy example to understand, it's working out. Like I've been working out since I left rehab, right now, seven days a week. Do you see the results?
The day after? No, but I can tell look at me now. The accident
Amra Pajalic (21:03)
Mm mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:05)
we we we would say that it was 10 years ago. That doesn't happen overnight. It's
Amra Pajalic (21:08)
Mm mm. Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:11)
always small bit and they're annoying because they're tiring. And the and the thing is, the example I always like to use is the negative impact of not doing them is literally this. Your life will still be pretty decent.
You still have some people that will like you. Bills will probably be paid. So it's just this. That's why we love
Amra Pajalic (21:31)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:32)
staying here. But there we gets interesting, the positive impact of doing those small, tiny, daily things is this. You're not even
Amra Pajalic (21:40)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:41)
able to see it on camera. And
Amra Pajalic (21:43)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:44)
being here, you will only see it when you start doing. And that's why we always we we all love to stay here because it's
Amra Pajalic (21:51)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:51)
just okay.
You know what? Until one day, it won't be anymore. my god,
Amra Pajalic (21:55)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (21:56)
why did I didn't I do more? Why didn't I do that? Regret.
I'm afraid of regret, by the way. I'm so afraid of it.
Amra Pajalic (22:03)
So you find that's a big motivation for you in terms of decisions that you're making every day?
Viincent Van den Broeck (22:08)
one hundred percent my biggest motivation is just literally
Being me, like being able to consciously tell myself, like, hey, I'm happy.
Amra Pajalic (22:17)
U
Viincent Van den Broeck (22:17)
Even in even in we would not even be talking if it wouldn't make me happy.
Amra Pajalic (22:22)
Mm, mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (22:23)
So I consciously decide every single moment that I'm doing what I love to do. And you know what? Okay, of course I do things that I kind of hate because part of the business, part of life,
but most of the time I'm just doing things that I love to do.
Like,
Amra Pajalic (22:36)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (22:37)
remember when we were kids and we were just so excited to start a day, like, mom, dad, let's wake up. No, let's start a day. And then at the end of the day, it was just you were tired. It was you were done. It was enough. Ready to go to bed.
Amra Pajalic (22:51)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (22:51)
When did when did we stop being kids? Like I'm literally a kid in an adult body with adult responsibilities. But the way
I move through life as a kid, I'm excited
to start my day.
Amra Pajalic (23:03)
Yes.
I have to say that's something I've really focused on also. Like, you know, I had that little bit of a midlife crisis, where I have battled my body and my hormones going through perimenopause and I am now just striving for joy and just trying to do things where I am just living consciously with joy.
and there's all these things that I do on a weekly basis. I bake bread every week, I bake a cake every week, or biscuits, I have my garden, I water every day and my plants. And like those are the things that, you know, it's those daily habits, is those daily moments that really create that meaning. we have fantastical moments in our life also, but those are rare. We need to
Viincent Van den Broeck (23:50)
Mm-hmm.
Amra Pajalic (23:50)
get the joy from the everyday.
Viincent Van den Broeck (23:52)
Yeah.
Amra Pajalic (23:53)
and live like a kid, as you said, and and really, you know, treasure the moments that we have because like you, I've had days where my life changed in an instant and tragedy came and dealing with years o of of grief and trauma from those moments. and
It's it's horrible but like it it really you makes you realise how that can happen at any moment and not to take things for granted. because they they just that's life. and sometimes you have these cinematic moments in life where you're like, That shouldn't happen, like, you know, you walking to work and and just being hit by a a a e scooter and you know, that you had this beautiful moment with your wife just before it happened.
But they do. That is why, you know, we do have those moments in cinema because they are
Viincent Van den Broeck (24:44)
Yeah.
Amra Pajalic (24:44)
real in that way.
Viincent Van den Broeck (24:46)
You figured out
life by the way by the way, you figured out life, huh? On it on everything you said
Amra Pajalic (24:50)
Ugh.
Viincent Van den Broeck (24:51)
in the past twenty minutes, you figured out life. Literally.
Amra Pajalic (24:54)
Vincent, like you, I've had a lot of tragedy. So the last thing that happened was my stepfather committed suicide and then eleven months
Viincent Van den Broeck (25:03)
Mm, sorry.
Amra Pajalic (25:04)
later my mother passed away. And it was like it you know, one of those days where you just wake up and you're doing your day to day.
And then suddenly in a moment your whole life is changed. And I just remember driving in the car and going, This can't be my life. This can't be my life. Just that that disbelief. And then once these things happen, you're like, Well, this is it, this is what life is.
Viincent Van den Broeck (25:31)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (25:32)
That these things happen to you. They don't happen to other people, they happen to you. and I've had quite a few of those. and
It really puts things into perspective.
Viincent Van den Broeck (25:41)
Always,
always.
Amra Pajalic (25:42)
Mm.
Yeah. yeah. So I wanted to go back a little bit and talk about the rebuild, and you know, you were learning to walk again, hold a fork. You've said that the first fifty meters unaided felt bigger than opening a business ever had. What does that do to your definition of achievement?
Viincent Van den Broeck (26:00)
I even posted on it on Instagram a while ago. It's funny how ambition can change from opening more restaurants to just being healthy.
Amra Pajalic (26:08)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (26:08)
Literally like it, I'm even more I've always been non-negotiable about my own happiness, but I'm even bigger right now on all that. I'm
black and white when it comes to my own happiness. Literally, if should I wake up tomorrow and hate the going to the restaurant, I leave the place on the spot. Should
Amra Pajalic (26:28)
Mm. Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (26:30)
I wake up?
tomorrow and not be happy anymore in my apartment, which I love by the way.
Amra Pajalic (26:36)
Yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (26:36)
I'm I I move. I'm
Amra Pajalic (26:38)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (26:39)
not black and white when it comes to when it comes to those wins. And it and of course I saw it from very close how even the small things can become really big. But again it's it's funny how the brain works because brain is very good at forgetting trauma.
Amra Pajalic (26:55)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (26:56)
It sticks with you for a while, but even even myself, like the accident scene like ages ago. Like I do not vividly I of course rationally I remember the things I went through, but I do not vividly remember those tragic moments like not being able to eat by myself or walk. Like right now I'm running and I'm not thinking. I what I do what I do though is I remind myself when I'm
Ready to so I'm working out and I'm ready to quit. I tell my bro, two years ago you were not able to work, go further, push
Amra Pajalic (27:28)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (27:28)
yourself more. So I would remind myself, I would always there we all have this inner voice negative inner voice in our minds. And what I always say is you just need to talk louder than that voice. And that is what I do on a on a of course I have doubts, of course I question myself sometimes, of course I have tough moments. I just talk louder to my
And I do not mean talking out loud, but I'm just reminding my stop stop whip complaining. Go further. Push more. Let's go. Just talk louder.
Amra Pajalic (27:57)
Mm, yeah, I mean that self talk is just so important. I've been seeing a lot of things popping up on social media and I've been doing a lot of articulating to myself. So I I actually sort of talked to talk myself through things.
Viincent Van den Broeck (28:11)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (28:12)
and I've noticed that lately I've been, you know, the past few years as I've I've rebuilt after my my personal tragedies, and they also I had health issues that
you know, developed as a result of those. as you get kinder to yourself, it also gets better. You know, like sometimes we we seem to I don't know, we can show kindness to other people, but to ourselves we seem to have these expectations and and the way that we sort of tell ourselves about things. and
Viincent Van den Broeck (28:38)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (28:38)
I've noticed that when I'm as I've been kinder to myself and and, you know, I I'm disappointed sometimes in terms of I haven't done this or et cetera, et cetera. But then when I'm like, well, you've done that
you've done the other thing, like don't go into putting down, go into what has been achieved, what has been done.
Viincent Van den Broeck (28:56)
Yeah.
Amra Pajalic (28:56)
it really helps.
Viincent Van den Broeck (28:57)
There's three things I I also posted on it recently. There's three things I encourage every if you wanna see big change, there's three simple things that you can do on a daily basis. One, talk positive about yourself, two, think highly of yourself, three, choose gratitude every single day. That's simple. And you know what? In the beginning, pretend someone asks you, you do not feel great. no, I'm doing great.
The the power of words, the power of thoughts you could not even imagine. By the way, thoughts influence speech. Speech speech influences behavior. Behavior will always influence life. In both directions, negative or positive.
Amra Pajalic (29:39)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (29:39)
Literally.
Amra Pajalic (29:40)
And that's so true, 'cause like, you know, at work it's like, How are you doing? And a few years ago I would always be going for the whinging for the the thing that's annoying me or the things that's not okay. Whereas now I'm like, Well, it's a Friday. Well, I've got this, well I've got that. And so it's just reframing into that positive. it shifts me out of it and and it has been keeping me in a much calmer state.
and it really is important. It really does matter because I see people who choose that negative who always kind of go into that negative mindset. and and they're not kind to themselves and they're not kind to other people either. because of that, because they've got that space in their head.
Viincent Van den Broeck (30:23)
Up it's that simple. And again, the conversation is never about it being easy or it being difficult. You know what? Beautiful things in life are supposed to be difficult, but it's that simple. Like we love to overcomplicate. Yeah, but those two words, I hate them. Yeah, but yep. Stop using them already.
Amra Pajalic (30:42)
Yeah.
Viincent Van den Broeck (30:42)
It is supposed to be the most beautiful views in life.
Come after the most toughest climbs.
Amra Pajalic (30:49)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (30:49)
And
that you know what? And that we accept. We're ready to go to Bali, climb a mountain at four AM in the morning to go look a view. Go see
Amra Pajalic (30:57)
Yes.
Viincent Van den Broeck (30:57)
a view. Like, come on, what are we doing? But for ourselves? All of a sudden that's life is supposed to be easy. Like who are we kidding?
Amra Pajalic (31:05)
Yes. And I think that I don't know, personally for me, growing up with a a difficult childhood, and the perspective that it gave me, because I had a lot of uncertainty and a lot of, you know, foster homes and moving around and no stability.
And so for me being a grown up was the best thing in the world. It's like I pay my bills, I choose where I live, I choose what I do with my day. Those are all really important decisions because when you are a child and you are at the mercy of unpredictable adults and unpredictable life, it really, you know, creates a a lot of of, you know, noise
in your head.
Viincent Van den Broeck (31:45)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (31:46)
and then I I remember when I I started because I I moved out of home when I was quite young, nineteen and a lot of people are like, paying bills and this is hard. I'm like, This is awesome. This is the best thing ever. I'm a grown up. No one can make decisions for me. I do it. It's great
It was just such a different perspective. I just remember I'm like, why are you why is this a bad thing? I don't understand.
still love building businesses and chasing ambition goals. You haven't renounced ambition but it's indifferent in how you relate to your success now. So now it seems to be more about happiness and things, you know, they have to do more than just be about ambition and about success and how
other people look at you, it's more about your joy and your you know, how you feel about it. Do you think that's an accurate shift?
Viincent Van den Broeck (32:37)
It was always about that. The thing is priorities have changed. Like I remember missing my sister daughter's four first birthdays and I remember and it was just before the accident of my sister sending videos in the group chat of them being dressed as princesses for their birthdays and I was opening the restaurant and I started falling into tears.
That I'm never doing again. I'm never missing any single birthday. I'm never missing out on barbecues with the family anymore. We eat every single night together, my wife and I, which would never have happened before the accident. So it was already really important. Like the joy was also really important before the accident. The thing I was so focused on getting us into a better situation with the business that I lost track of.
All the other things that are also important more important. So it's just a priority shift. Same for the working out, like almost never worked out before the accident. Right now it became a non-negotiable. I'm working out literally every single day. So there's just it's literally a priority shift. And that is, you know what? And that is what life is about. Like don't I'm only 34. Back then I was 32.
So and you know what? And the Vincent in from 10 years from now we'll probably be different. We'll probably be doing different things from let alone 20 years from now. And it always goes back to the most important thing. And what I preach all the time is just you being honest towards yourself, you living a life without any regret, you being able to tell yourself at your very last moment I did everything I wanted to do.
And I said everything I wanted to say, which by the way could have happened when I was 32.
Amra Pajalic (34:15)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (34:15)
Did I want to travel more? Did I want to spend more time with family? Yeah, of course. But life is life. You make choice. Life is made out of decisions, and you that have to live with them. And I was at peace with my decisions. I chose to build businesses. And you know what? Okay, COVID came along, and then I got business partners that then
Sorry for the word, but fucked me, which cost me a lot of money. Okay, life is life. Boo hoo.
Amra Pajalic (34:40)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (34:43)
But I was at peace working every day. It fulfilled me. And
Amra Pajalic (34:47)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (34:48)
being tonight is my aunt's birthday. I will be there. And you know what?
Amra Pajalic (34:52)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (34:53)
Should there be business problems tonight, okay? They will be fixed tomorrow.
Amra Pajalic (34:56)
Mm, mm. I think that's the thing. We kinda get so caught up in those external things, and make them too important. And it's like, no, they can wait. That that's okay.
Viincent Van den Broeck (35:06)
Mm-hmm.
Amra Pajalic (35:07)
Yeah, I love that. so this book, I comes out on the two year anniversary. D was that deliberate or did it just kinda happen where the writing process developed and then you're like, Okay, we're gonna set it for that date?
Viincent Van den Broeck (35:20)
no, it it is ready since a year already. The
or at least beginning of this year. It was
Amra Pajalic (35:26)
Mm-hmm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (35:26)
already ready to be published. The thing for me it was important because recovery was supposed to take two years. That was a narrative back in the hospital to to my wife. They was like, Yeah, okay, recovery will probably take two years. Guess what? It took two months and a half. So I wanted it to be full circle. So
Amra Pajalic (35:43)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (35:43)
instead of being done with rehab, I'm publishing my book.
Amra Pajalic (35:46)
Mm.
Mm. So that's in a sense a celebration of that journey and of that rebuild for yourself. Yeah. That's
Viincent Van den Broeck (35:52)
Celebration. Celebration
of life. And you know what? It's
To the core, I'm someone that wants the best. I want everybody to win. You'll get advice even if you didn't ask for it. I will help you for whatever, whenever. And so for me, it is literally to prove people, you see, you can do this. Whatever you're
chasing, you're able. I just wanted it to be full. I wanted it, I wanted it to be that I wanted it to be a magical moment, like sparkling around.
Amra Pajalic (36:22)
Mm you wanted to leave that feeling. I actually was reading your book and I loved that that the end what you finished with were kind of lessons and and mantras and and you know things that people you know to to make people think. And I remember going through that list and just feeling this like little like moment of t you know, just connection where I'm like, yes, yes, that's that's that's the one. so
From my perspective you succeeded in that. You you
Viincent Van den Broeck (36:51)
Wow.
Amra Pajalic (36:51)
created that sort of a journey and that that sense of, you know, here is a little pocket full of wisdom for you, to walk away with.
Viincent Van den Broeck (37:00)
wow.
You you literally you literally made my day already. Wait, did you read the the whole book?
Amra Pajalic (37:07)
Yeah, I read it. I was reading it quickly though because I was
Viincent Van den Broeck (37:09)
Globally. Yeah.
Amra Pajalic (37:10)
like, yeah. so I got I got the gist and then when I I I was like, okay, yeah, yeah. And then I got to that part and I was like, I'm really I don't know, just 'cause it was like a little life lessons and it was you talking about how it just reconfirms things for you and these were the things that it reconfirmed. and I was just like, Yes.
and I've actually like you how we were talking earlier about this interview, I've actually been telling people, I'm like, I'm gonna be interviewing this really cool guy. this is what happened to him. I'm just like, I can't wait. It's gonna like I'm just already so fascinated.
Viincent Van den Broeck (37:45)
wow.
Amra Pajalic (37:46)
and people are like, Wow, that sounds really interesting. I'm like, Yes, it is, it's really interesting. and this is the thing, you know, we we love stories, we love hearing about people's journeys and and we love
thinking about, you know, how what what can we get from that and this whole podcast is premised on that. It's on people telling their stories and what are the lessons that we can get from it. because this is what I love doing. I love listening to, you know, media, to watching things
and and just
Viincent Van den Broeck (38:16)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (38:17)
walking away with a a moment, you know, a thought, a new idea.
and you know, yeah, so I I found that that's what I loved about it too. so you
Viincent Van den Broeck (38:29)
Right.
Amra Pajalic (38:30)
s y you said why not me is the question you want to leave readers with. what's something you're rec you're currently asking that of in your own life right now? Why not me?
Viincent Van den Broeck (38:41)
Traveling global with this message.
Amra Pajalic (38:44)
Mm.
Viincent Van den Broeck (38:44)
Bringing positivity to as many places as possible. Bringing the book, the story, the wisdom, the the the the journey, the conversations to as many places as possible.
Amra Pajalic (38:57)
I love that. That's beautiful.
Viincent Van den Broeck (38:57)
Which is by the way gonna is
which is by the way gonna happen. I'm speaking it into existence.
Amra Pajalic (39:01)
Well, you have to. I mean the thing is we have to be our own advocates and also we kinda have to believe like when I start writing a book, I believe that book is going to change the world in some way. That's what I built. So when I was writing my memoir, Things Nobody Knows But Me, I was like, I am writing about being parented by a mother who has bipolar and a mother
Viincent Van den Broeck (39:23)
Mm.
Amra Pajalic (39:23)
who is from a non English speaking background who doesn't understand her mental illness. And
That got me through five years of writing and going to therapy and, you know, really exploring the darkness of of a lot of moments. And then when it went out into the world, I I got that. I had readers read it and connect with me and feel seen
Viincent Van den Broeck (39:47)
Wow.
Amra Pajalic (39:48)
and and have those moments and this is what memoir does. This is what sharing, you know, these
things and and these stories and these moments that have happened to us. So I really believe that you are, you know, already doing that and you will continue doing that.
Viincent Van den Broeck (40:04)
Thank you. Thank you.
Amra Pajalic (40:05)
So I'm very excited for you. And I just wanted to ask one last thing. If someone listening is in their own version of one day, one day I'll slow down, one day I'll call that person, one day I'll start, what's the one honest question you want them to ask themselves tonight?
Viincent Van den Broeck (40:23)
Mm.
First of all, be truly honest. If it's kinda or I think that's a no. You do not want that. The question is, the simple question is, do I really want this?
Mia, you by yourself. Take away the money, take away your parents, take away your family, take away your kids, take away your current situation, take away the past and the future. In this moment, is this what I really want? Yeah, binary. Yes, no. Kinda, I think it's a no.
Say something different.
Amra Pajalic (40:54)
Yeah, yeah. Like have that courage to try because we don't know we don't know what's gonna happen on a day to day basis. We've had those one days that everything's changed, yeah. So where can listeners find you and learn more about your book?
Viincent Van den Broeck (41:12)
Yeah, the book is the it's already up by the way for pre-orders right now. You can buy it on Amazon. It's Vincent in the Kitchen on Instagram, on TikTok, on YouTube. And honestly, I just love to talk to people. So if you want to talk about whatever, whenever it's Vincent in the Kitchen on all platforms. And please do. No hidden agenda.
Amra Pajalic (41:32)
Beautiful. Thank you so much for reaching out to me and thank you for this beautiful conversation and this beautiful moment. and I I am just so looking forward to as your book comes out seeing all the things that you achieve with it.
Viincent Van den Broeck (41:47)
Thank you. Thank you, Amra for real. It has been it was amazing. Thank you.
Amra Pajalic (41:51)
Thank you.