The Most Romantic Thing My Husband Ever Did Was Leave the Bedroom

My husband and I haven’t shared a bed in years.
Not because we hate each other.
Not because our marriage failed.
Not because we’re secretly miserable.

It started when I was pregnant and vomiting through the night. Then came breastfeeding, insomnia, snoring, mismatched body temperatures, middle age, and the slow realisation that sleep deprivation is not actually romantic.
Somewhere along the way, we accidentally discovered that separate bedrooms made us kinder to each other.

This new essay explores the rise of “sleep divorce,” the research around couples sleeping apart, and why the shared bed has somehow become the gold standard of intimacy—even when nobody is actually sleeping.

After 29 years of marriage, I’ve come to believe romance is not lying awake resenting someone in the dark.

Romance is letting them sleep.
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https://open.substack.com/pub/amrasarmchairanecdotes/p/the-most-romantic-thing-my-husband?r=i0jxk&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true