I am working on my PhD exegesis, examining how three non-Bosnian authors are writing about the Srebrenica genocide. Today I am typing up notes written at the top of each chapter of The Unquiet Death by Ausma Zehanat Khan. Emotion is pressing down on me as I read victim testimonies from the The International Criminal Tribunal. When I was reading the book these snippets were at the beginning of the chapter, a tug of sadness, a moment to mourn, and then I would dive straight into the narrative and be compelled by the murder mystery. 

But now typing them up, chapter after chapter, the weight is pilling on. The horror and pain is so evident, so sad, I can barely keep myself from crying. Maybe I need to cry, get the emotion out. I have cried so much while working on this PhD. Cried so much each time I dive back into Srebrenica and the horror of genocide. It is important that I cry, but also important that I continue the work, that I make my contribution to the understanding of this event and the way it is written about. At least that’s what I have to tell myself as I keep going.

Have ended up reading quite a few books in these series and love that it doesn't matter in what order you read them, you can just enjoy it because they are stand-alone. Hammer does rural crime so well with these really intricate plots and various points of view. I just get sucked right in and love the world and can't wait to find out the resolution. Great stuff!!!!

At my studio today, just did a poke around outside and stumbled onto the Sunshine Historical Society office. Got given some historic cards that are cute. Am going to poke around on their website and see whether I can incorporate a historical murder in my new murder series. Always spinning ideas and yarns in my head. 

Had the best night attending a silent 80s disco at Melbourne Museum with my bestie Veronica. We've been friends for 35 years, dancing partners for 30 since we came of age and launched ourselves onto the world of clubs. Have heard there are now going to be daylight discos for our generation beginning at 6.30 to 10. I see a lot more daggy dancing in our future. 

Heartfelt book about a famous actor who finds herself unhomed. Ireland beautifully melds the backstory about the creation of Dolly as an up and coming actor with her present storyline as an unhomed person. Beautifully told and highlights a important issue. I read this after Ireland’s latest book Studio Girls as the research for that inspired this book.

I bought the sequel to It Ends with Us after reading the first book and was hesitant to dive back in. After watching the movie, which I absolutely adored, I was desperate to be back in the world of Lily and Atlas. This sequel was so beautifully crafted and gives us a great melding of their back story, their current love being played out, while also addressing the reality of domestic abuse the complicated way it takes to move forward when there is a child involved. Sublime.

Just posted an update in my group chat with my fellow PhDers Kimberley Starr and Vikki Petraitis:

"Just touching base as I've sent off some writing to supervisors. Feeling really good. I think I've found my theoretical framework and that it's helping me to make sense of all my thoughts and bug bears. Have a new title  Emotional Truth in the Shadow of History: Analysing the Intersection of Fact and Fiction in Srebrenica Novels by Non-Bosnian Authors, so will be abbreviating to In the Shadow of History. Fingers crossed I have a good meeting with supervisors and can confirm that we have lift off. Having this accelerated program and the weekly coaching has really given me a kick in the pants and I'm determined that I will finish this draft before the end of the year."

Feeling good and celebrating a very productive week this week.

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